May 11, Evening Devotional
"Be strong and very courageous." Joshua 1:7
Our God's tender love for His servants makes Him concerned for the state of their inward feelings. He desires them to be of good courage. Some regard it as a small thing for a believer to be vexed with doubts and fears, but God doesn't think so. From this text it is plain that our Master doesn't want us to be entangled with fears. He wants us to be without anxiety, without doubt, without cowardice. Our Master doesn't think so lightly of our unbelief as we do. When we are hopeless we are subject to a grievous malady, not to be trifled with, but to be carried at once to the beloved Physician. Our Lord doesn't love to see our countenance sad. It was a law of Xerxes that no one should come into the king's court dressed in mourning: this is not the law of the King of kings, for we may come mourning as we are; but still He wants us to put off the spirit of heaviness and put on the garment of praise, for there is so much reason to rejoice. The Christian ought to be of a courageous spirit in order to glorify the Lord by enduring trials in an heroic manner. If you are fearful and fainthearted, you will dishonor your God. Besides, what a bad example it is. This disease of doubtfulness and discouragement is an epidemic which soon spreads among the Lord's flock. One downcast believer makes twenty souls sad. Moreover, unless your courage is kept up, Satan will be too much for you. Let your spirit be joyful in God your Savior, the joy of the Lord shall be your strength, and no fiend of hell shall make headway against you: but cowardice throws down the banner. Moreover, work is light to a man of cheerful spirit; and success waits upon cheerfulness. Those who toil, rejoicing in their God, believing with all their hearts, has success guaranteed. Those who sow in hope shall reap in joy; therefore, dear reader, "be strong and very courageous."
C.H. Spurgeon, Morning and Evening, Hendrickson Publishers, 1995.
For any of you readers who enjoy these devotionals, I just found them on-line! They have them on Christianity.com, you can sign up for daily e-mails: http://christianity.com/devotionals/morningandevening/
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"The most valuable thing the Psalms do for me is to express the same delight in God which made David dance." C.S. Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Friday, May 02, 2008
Links to great reads...
I've been saving these up to include in my next post, but this list is getting long! And I just can't get my next one written, it's on forgiveness... maybe that's why... who knows?!
So, thought I'd share these:
Encouragement for Today, GREAT Prayer:
http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/05/01/jehovah-saboath/#comments
Every Day Light, Strangers and Pilgrims http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/everydaylight/546676/
Christianity.com, Endless Love: http://www.christianity.com/Home/Christian%20Living%20Features/11574279/
Encouragement for Today, Going Through Trouble: http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/04/30/goingthroughtrouble/#comments
Christianity.com, Where Does Your Help Come From: http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/11574516/
Christianity.com, I Fought the Law, David Burchett: http://www.christianity.com/blogs/DBurchett/11574526/
Every Day Light, The Crucified "Self": http://christianity.com/devotionals/everydaylight/546680/
The Berean, Genesis 3:6: http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/5195/Genesis-3-6
So, thought I'd share these:
Encouragement for Today, GREAT Prayer:
http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/05/01/jehovah-saboath/#comments
Every Day Light, Strangers and Pilgrims http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/everydaylight/546676/
Christianity.com, Endless Love: http://www.christianity.com/Home/Christian%20Living%20Features/11574279/
Encouragement for Today, Going Through Trouble: http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/04/30/goingthroughtrouble/#comments
Christianity.com, Where Does Your Help Come From: http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/11574516/
Christianity.com, I Fought the Law, David Burchett: http://www.christianity.com/blogs/DBurchett/11574526/
Every Day Light, The Crucified "Self": http://christianity.com/devotionals/everydaylight/546680/
The Berean, Genesis 3:6: http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/5195/Genesis-3-6
Friday, April 18, 2008
Daily Dose of C.H. Spurgeon
Well, it’s my twice daily dose. This may your monthly dose. Or never-y dose, if you navigate away from this page.
April 18, morning devotional:
“She tied the scarlet cord in the window.” - Joshua 2:21
Rahab depended upon the promise of the spies for her preservation. She saw them as the representatives of the God of Israel. Her faith was simple and firm, but it was very obedient. To tie the scarlet cord in the window was a very trivial act in itself, but she dared not run the risk of omitting it. Come, my soul, isn’t there a lesson here for you? Have you been attentive to all your Lord’s will, even though some of His commands should seem non-essential? Have you observed in His own way the two ordinances of believers’ baptism and the Lord’s Supper? Neglecting these indicates that there is an enormous amount of unloving disobedience in your heart. From now on be blameless in all things, even tying a cord, if that is the command.
This act of Rahab sets forth a yet more solemn lesson. Have I implicitly trusted in the precious blood of Jesus? Have I tied the scarlet cord, as with a Gordian knot in my window, so that my trust can never be removed? Or can I look out towards the Dead Sea of my sins, or the Jerusalem of my hopes, without seeing the blood, and seeing all things in connection with its blessed power? The passerby can see a cord of so conspicuous a color, if it hangs from the window: it will be well for me if my life makes the efficacy of the atonement conspicuous to all onlookers. What is there to be ashamed of? Let human beings or devils stare if they want to; the blood is my boast and my song. My soul, there is One who will see that scarlet cord, even when, from weakness of faith, you cannot see it yourself; Jehovah, the Avenger, will see it and pass over you. Jericho’s walls fell flat: Rahab’s house was on the wall, and yet it stood unmoved; my nature is built into the wall of humanity, and yet when destruction smites the race, I shall be secure. My soul, tie the scarlet cord in the window afresh, and rest in peace.
C.H. Spurgeon, Morning and Evening, Hendrickson Publishers, 1995.
Good reading for today:
God in Nature: http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/04/18/god-in-nature-3/#comments
Matthew 23:23-Fidelity: http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/2140/Matthew-23-23
April 18, morning devotional:
“She tied the scarlet cord in the window.” - Joshua 2:21
Rahab depended upon the promise of the spies for her preservation. She saw them as the representatives of the God of Israel. Her faith was simple and firm, but it was very obedient. To tie the scarlet cord in the window was a very trivial act in itself, but she dared not run the risk of omitting it. Come, my soul, isn’t there a lesson here for you? Have you been attentive to all your Lord’s will, even though some of His commands should seem non-essential? Have you observed in His own way the two ordinances of believers’ baptism and the Lord’s Supper? Neglecting these indicates that there is an enormous amount of unloving disobedience in your heart. From now on be blameless in all things, even tying a cord, if that is the command.
This act of Rahab sets forth a yet more solemn lesson. Have I implicitly trusted in the precious blood of Jesus? Have I tied the scarlet cord, as with a Gordian knot in my window, so that my trust can never be removed? Or can I look out towards the Dead Sea of my sins, or the Jerusalem of my hopes, without seeing the blood, and seeing all things in connection with its blessed power? The passerby can see a cord of so conspicuous a color, if it hangs from the window: it will be well for me if my life makes the efficacy of the atonement conspicuous to all onlookers. What is there to be ashamed of? Let human beings or devils stare if they want to; the blood is my boast and my song. My soul, there is One who will see that scarlet cord, even when, from weakness of faith, you cannot see it yourself; Jehovah, the Avenger, will see it and pass over you. Jericho’s walls fell flat: Rahab’s house was on the wall, and yet it stood unmoved; my nature is built into the wall of humanity, and yet when destruction smites the race, I shall be secure. My soul, tie the scarlet cord in the window afresh, and rest in peace.
C.H. Spurgeon, Morning and Evening, Hendrickson Publishers, 1995.
Good reading for today:
God in Nature: http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/04/18/god-in-nature-3/#comments
Matthew 23:23-Fidelity: http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/2140/Matthew-23-23
Thursday, April 10, 2008
"to believe is to begin"
Hosea's Wife (Album Version)
I just spoke silence with the seeker next to me
She had a heart with hesitant, halting speech
That turned to mine and asked belligerently
"What do I live for?"
I see the scars of searches everywhere I go
From hearts to wars to literature to radio
There's a question like a shame no one will show
"What do I live for?"
We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using people like ladders and words like knives
CHORUS
If we've eyes to see
If we've ears to hear
To find it in our hearts and mouths
The word that saves is near
Shed that shallow skin
Come and live again
Leave all you were before
To believe is to begin
There is truth in little corners of our lives
There are hints of it in songs and children's eyes
It's familiar, like an ancient lullaby
What do I live for?
We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using bodies like money and truth like lies
CHORUS
Bridge
We are more than dust
That means something
That means something
We are more than just
Blood and emotions
Inklings and notions
Atoms on oceans
Copyright Brooke Fraser
Go here for the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROQNdDNR0Jg
I just spoke silence with the seeker next to me
She had a heart with hesitant, halting speech
That turned to mine and asked belligerently
"What do I live for?"
I see the scars of searches everywhere I go
From hearts to wars to literature to radio
There's a question like a shame no one will show
"What do I live for?"
We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using people like ladders and words like knives
CHORUS
If we've eyes to see
If we've ears to hear
To find it in our hearts and mouths
The word that saves is near
Shed that shallow skin
Come and live again
Leave all you were before
To believe is to begin
There is truth in little corners of our lives
There are hints of it in songs and children's eyes
It's familiar, like an ancient lullaby
What do I live for?
We are Hosea's wife
We are squandering this life
Using bodies like money and truth like lies
CHORUS
Bridge
We are more than dust
That means something
That means something
We are more than just
Blood and emotions
Inklings and notions
Atoms on oceans
Copyright Brooke Fraser
Go here for the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROQNdDNR0Jg
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Amazing Grace Indeed
Once Was Lost / Now Am Found
LOST
The weight of the world on two shoulders.
Bearing.down.relentless.
Storms never ceasing.
Utterly defenseless, barely standing.
Alone.
Does it really have to be this way?
Fighting; in the keeping…can’t just give it away.
Two shoulders continue to drown.
SEARCHING
What is this…
want?
What is this…
need?
Something above and beyond…
this world.
What is this faith…
people speak of…
people die for?
There must be more.
There must be hope.
What else belongs in this hole
that never seems to fill?
FOUND
The Cross
True Love
The Greatest Cost
He sent His Son for me?
He gave His life for me?
A stone unturned.
The truth revealed.
The weight of my sins on His shoulders.
The weight of ALL sin for Him alone to bear.
Burdens lifted.
No longer alone.
A heart,
reborn
in Him.
LOST
The weight of the world on two shoulders.
Bearing.down.relentless.
Storms never ceasing.
Utterly defenseless, barely standing.
Alone.
Does it really have to be this way?
Fighting; in the keeping…can’t just give it away.
Two shoulders continue to drown.
SEARCHING
What is this…
want?
What is this…
need?
Something above and beyond…
this world.
What is this faith…
people speak of…
people die for?
There must be more.
There must be hope.
What else belongs in this hole
that never seems to fill?
FOUND
The Cross
True Love
The Greatest Cost
He sent His Son for me?
He gave His life for me?
A stone unturned.
The truth revealed.
The weight of my sins on His shoulders.
The weight of ALL sin for Him alone to bear.
Burdens lifted.
No longer alone.
A heart,
reborn
in Him.
Friday, April 04, 2008
Daily Dose of C.H. Spurgeon
This is an April 3 Evening Devotional of C.H. Spurgeon:
"We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all." Isaiah 53:6
Here is a confession of sin common to all the elect people of God. They have all fallen, and therefore, in common chorus, they all say, from the first who entered heaven to the last who shall enter there, "We all, like sheep, have gone astray." The confession, while thus unanimous, is also special and particular: "Each of us has turned to his own way." There is a peculiar sinfulness about each of us; all of us are sinful, but each of us has some special annoyance not found in the others. It is the mark of genuine repentance that while it naturally associates itself with other penitents, it also takes up a position of loneliness. "Each of us has turned to his own way" is a confession that each person had sinned against light peculiar to himself, or sinned with a vexation which he could not perceive in others. This confession is a giving up of all pleas of self-righteousness. It is the declaration of all human beings who are consciously guilty - guilty with vexations, guilty without excuse: they stand with their weapons of rebellion broken in pieces, and cry, "We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way." Yet we hear no sorrowful wailings attending this confession of sin being that the next sentence makes it almost a song. "The LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all." It is the most grievous sentence of the three, but it overflows with comfort. It is strange that, where misery was concentrated, mercy reigned; where sorrow reached her climax, weary souls find rest. The Savior bruised is the healing of bruised hearts. See how the lowliest penitence gives place to assured confidence through simply gazing at Christ on the cross!
C.H. Spurgeon’s, Morning and Evening, Henridckson Publishers, Copyright 1995.
"We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all." Isaiah 53:6
Here is a confession of sin common to all the elect people of God. They have all fallen, and therefore, in common chorus, they all say, from the first who entered heaven to the last who shall enter there, "We all, like sheep, have gone astray." The confession, while thus unanimous, is also special and particular: "Each of us has turned to his own way." There is a peculiar sinfulness about each of us; all of us are sinful, but each of us has some special annoyance not found in the others. It is the mark of genuine repentance that while it naturally associates itself with other penitents, it also takes up a position of loneliness. "Each of us has turned to his own way" is a confession that each person had sinned against light peculiar to himself, or sinned with a vexation which he could not perceive in others. This confession is a giving up of all pleas of self-righteousness. It is the declaration of all human beings who are consciously guilty - guilty with vexations, guilty without excuse: they stand with their weapons of rebellion broken in pieces, and cry, "We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way." Yet we hear no sorrowful wailings attending this confession of sin being that the next sentence makes it almost a song. "The LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all." It is the most grievous sentence of the three, but it overflows with comfort. It is strange that, where misery was concentrated, mercy reigned; where sorrow reached her climax, weary souls find rest. The Savior bruised is the healing of bruised hearts. See how the lowliest penitence gives place to assured confidence through simply gazing at Christ on the cross!
C.H. Spurgeon’s, Morning and Evening, Henridckson Publishers, Copyright 1995.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Play on Playa / Why 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye'
Interestingly (is that a word?) I've had conversations with two people about how they have been 'played' recently. Both instances are eerily similar, even though the situations are pretty different.
(names have been changed to protect their identity, from the 3 people who read my blog!)
Ex. 1: Ruby was told by a friend (hereafter referred to as Typical) she liked that he liked her. It was awkward for awhile, but then they finally talked about it, even went on a couple of dates. Then all of sudden, out of nowhere, Typical seemingly changed his mind. Did he tell her that he had changed his mind? Nope, he just decided to break a date, then be awkward all over again.
Now here is the question. Why couldn't Typical just tell her, 'hey, I've changed my mind, let's just be friends.' He has seriously made her lose her belief that any man is worth being with.
(now there is where I attempt to dive into his mind..)
Maybe Typical doesn't know what he wants from/with her or anybody. Maybe he doesn't care. Quite possibly he just enjoyed the attention. After all she's funny, successful, and smart. Well, maybe he was just intimidated.. could possibly be that. Ruby has an amazing job, which would be seen as 'above' his job (even though I promise you, she doesn't care about that).
Ugh, on to...
Ex. 2: Lori was hanging out with friends, and there was a new person (hereafter referred to as NKOTB) to the group. Mutual friends told her that NKOTB liked her. Lori wants to give NKOTB a chance, but is tired of having to pursue. She wants to be pursued. NKOTB acted interested around Lori, flirty text messages were flying everywhere. But NKOTB kinda seemed interested in Lori's friend at the same time. Lori, being the kind of person that everyone likes (seriously, she is hilarious and kind), isn't too worried about it, but is ANNOYED! Why does this keep happening!?!
(here we go again..)
Maybe NKOTB just doesn't know why in the world to like ANYBODY. 'Hey, that person is nice, think I'll like her for a minute, but then LOOK, that other person is nice, too! Think I'll like both of them, and just play this game, see who comes to me first.' Cleverly placed (yeah right) MySpace comments ensue. Lori's friend doesn't like these games, either, so NKOTB seems to be out of luck in this situation.
So, here is my segway into 'Kissing Dating Goodbye.' Did you like it? Very clever, I know...
I read the book 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye,' by Joshua Harris a few weeks ago. I had found it on my church's website (or was possibly led to another website, not sure), it had suggestions for books by different categories. The 'Single' category only had 2 books. 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye' and 'Boy Meets Girl,' both by Joshua Harris. At first I was skeptical, I've never been much of a dater, so in a sense, I've never kissed dating HELLO. But I went ahead and ordered it from Amazon.
Oh how I loved this book. Some of my friends (church friends at that) asked me why in the world I would read it. It's for high school kids! Well, I'll tell ya right now, it most certainly is not! Now there are the 'let your parents be part of this relationship' and 'the guy has to ask the dad of the girl he wants to court's permission,' parts; which yes, seem old fashioned - and also not very practical once you leave your hometown. But my question is; why not have your parents involved? As people who most likely know you best in this world (even if you think they don't, believe me, they are paying attention), would it be so wrong to utilyze them in a situation such as 'dating, or courting?' If you don't trust your parents to fulfill this role, a strong Christian couple would work, too. (I want to make clear that the book wants to change the definition of dating, as in not using the 'worldly' usage of dating, so he just changed the name to 'courtship.' I guess you could call it what you like, my church calls it 'Biblical dating').
Anyway, I feel as though I'm getting off track, and I apologize. Harris' best points (at least for me) were that the problem with the world's view of dating are that expectations aren't discussed or even realized. Using my examples from above, both of my friends want to get married and have children. However, in today's worldly definition of dating, that is never to be brought up! That would be the absolute first thing to drive someone away (in most cases, not all). So, two people can go on dating for months or even years and never know the other's expectations. I hesitate to use the term 'wasted time,' because I think you can learn from just about any situation. But wouldn't it be better if a girl who wants to get married and have kids would be able to know that - from the start - the guy felt the same way? It would save a lot of heartache, that's for sure!
And then we get to why people want to date in the first place. Let's say you hear that someone likes you. How does that make you feel? For me, I get extremely uncomfortable, mainly because these guys don't know me at all. Now how can someone like me, if they don't really know me. And I know what some of you will say, 'that's what dating is for!' But if I were to go with the world's definition of dating, then the following would occur:
-I would go on a first date, where we would talk about our likes and dislikes, about our pasts, our families, our friends our jobs, whatever.
-If we got long, more dates would ensue, and emotional intimacy would be felt, even assumed by both parties.
-Let's not even get into physical intimacy, I think we all know how that can occur!
-Either a break up would occur, leaving me broken-hearted, jaded, or whatever. Or I would marry the guy, in which case another question comes up...
WHY DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED IN THE FIRST PLACE???
I hate to admit that I go through periods of feeling sorry for myself. Why oh why haven't I met the man of my dreams? Why oh why must I sit on the sidelines and watch everyone else have these 'great' relationships, get married, have kids... why why why why why?
I was having one of those episodes a few weeks ago (before I read the book), and then I stopped myself. I asked myself, 'what is your motivation for wanting to get married, Mandi?' Is it because I'm lonely (which I shouldn't be, God is always with me)? Am I jealous of my friends (oops, there I go again, coveting)? Or am I wanting to get married so that my life and marriage can glorify God?
Well duh! Hadn't I just redevoted my life to God? Haven't I asked Him how I can glorify Him, through word or deed? Then, when it comes to the biggest decisions of my life (and yes, I believe that marriage is for life), shouldn't God be the first place I look? That whenever I get married, that relationship should glorify God even more than I could ever do on my own???
Duh duh duh.
So here goes another step on my journey. I will no longer be dating. Not in the sense that everybody means it. I will be serving the Lord. And when He sees fit, He will bring a man into my life who will see that I love God above all. If that man feels moved to, he will pursue me. And, if God wills it, that man will want to marry me. And I will want to marry Him. All for the glory of God. Not so we won't be lonely. Not because we feel it's time to settle down. Not so we can have kids. Just for HIM.
By using the Bible to live every aspect of my life, even with dating/courting/whatever-name-you-want-to-give-it, God will bless me more than if I think I could while attempting this alone. That's the great thing about having God in your life. You never have to do anything alone again. Even if you are 'single.'
Dear Lord - I cast all my cares on you. Especially the biggest one; how is it that I can best glorify YOU. I will attempt to have a servant's heart at all times. I submit to your Supremacy in my life. I pray for your help with my purity. I pray for my single brother's and sister's who are struggling. I pray that Your will be done. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the well spring of life.
Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
14For this reason I kneel before the Father,
15from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name.
16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,
17so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,
18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,
19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
20Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,
21to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:14-21 (NIV)
(names have been changed to protect their identity, from the 3 people who read my blog!)
Ex. 1: Ruby was told by a friend (hereafter referred to as Typical) she liked that he liked her. It was awkward for awhile, but then they finally talked about it, even went on a couple of dates. Then all of sudden, out of nowhere, Typical seemingly changed his mind. Did he tell her that he had changed his mind? Nope, he just decided to break a date, then be awkward all over again.
Now here is the question. Why couldn't Typical just tell her, 'hey, I've changed my mind, let's just be friends.' He has seriously made her lose her belief that any man is worth being with.
(now there is where I attempt to dive into his mind..)
Maybe Typical doesn't know what he wants from/with her or anybody. Maybe he doesn't care. Quite possibly he just enjoyed the attention. After all she's funny, successful, and smart. Well, maybe he was just intimidated.. could possibly be that. Ruby has an amazing job, which would be seen as 'above' his job (even though I promise you, she doesn't care about that).
Ugh, on to...
Ex. 2: Lori was hanging out with friends, and there was a new person (hereafter referred to as NKOTB) to the group. Mutual friends told her that NKOTB liked her. Lori wants to give NKOTB a chance, but is tired of having to pursue. She wants to be pursued. NKOTB acted interested around Lori, flirty text messages were flying everywhere. But NKOTB kinda seemed interested in Lori's friend at the same time. Lori, being the kind of person that everyone likes (seriously, she is hilarious and kind), isn't too worried about it, but is ANNOYED! Why does this keep happening!?!
(here we go again..)
Maybe NKOTB just doesn't know why in the world to like ANYBODY. 'Hey, that person is nice, think I'll like her for a minute, but then LOOK, that other person is nice, too! Think I'll like both of them, and just play this game, see who comes to me first.' Cleverly placed (yeah right) MySpace comments ensue. Lori's friend doesn't like these games, either, so NKOTB seems to be out of luck in this situation.
So, here is my segway into 'Kissing Dating Goodbye.' Did you like it? Very clever, I know...
I read the book 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye,' by Joshua Harris a few weeks ago. I had found it on my church's website (or was possibly led to another website, not sure), it had suggestions for books by different categories. The 'Single' category only had 2 books. 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye' and 'Boy Meets Girl,' both by Joshua Harris. At first I was skeptical, I've never been much of a dater, so in a sense, I've never kissed dating HELLO. But I went ahead and ordered it from Amazon.
Oh how I loved this book. Some of my friends (church friends at that) asked me why in the world I would read it. It's for high school kids! Well, I'll tell ya right now, it most certainly is not! Now there are the 'let your parents be part of this relationship' and 'the guy has to ask the dad of the girl he wants to court's permission,' parts; which yes, seem old fashioned - and also not very practical once you leave your hometown. But my question is; why not have your parents involved? As people who most likely know you best in this world (even if you think they don't, believe me, they are paying attention), would it be so wrong to utilyze them in a situation such as 'dating, or courting?' If you don't trust your parents to fulfill this role, a strong Christian couple would work, too. (I want to make clear that the book wants to change the definition of dating, as in not using the 'worldly' usage of dating, so he just changed the name to 'courtship.' I guess you could call it what you like, my church calls it 'Biblical dating').
Anyway, I feel as though I'm getting off track, and I apologize. Harris' best points (at least for me) were that the problem with the world's view of dating are that expectations aren't discussed or even realized. Using my examples from above, both of my friends want to get married and have children. However, in today's worldly definition of dating, that is never to be brought up! That would be the absolute first thing to drive someone away (in most cases, not all). So, two people can go on dating for months or even years and never know the other's expectations. I hesitate to use the term 'wasted time,' because I think you can learn from just about any situation. But wouldn't it be better if a girl who wants to get married and have kids would be able to know that - from the start - the guy felt the same way? It would save a lot of heartache, that's for sure!
And then we get to why people want to date in the first place. Let's say you hear that someone likes you. How does that make you feel? For me, I get extremely uncomfortable, mainly because these guys don't know me at all. Now how can someone like me, if they don't really know me. And I know what some of you will say, 'that's what dating is for!' But if I were to go with the world's definition of dating, then the following would occur:
-I would go on a first date, where we would talk about our likes and dislikes, about our pasts, our families, our friends our jobs, whatever.
-If we got long, more dates would ensue, and emotional intimacy would be felt, even assumed by both parties.
-Let's not even get into physical intimacy, I think we all know how that can occur!
-Either a break up would occur, leaving me broken-hearted, jaded, or whatever. Or I would marry the guy, in which case another question comes up...
WHY DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED IN THE FIRST PLACE???
I hate to admit that I go through periods of feeling sorry for myself. Why oh why haven't I met the man of my dreams? Why oh why must I sit on the sidelines and watch everyone else have these 'great' relationships, get married, have kids... why why why why why?
I was having one of those episodes a few weeks ago (before I read the book), and then I stopped myself. I asked myself, 'what is your motivation for wanting to get married, Mandi?' Is it because I'm lonely (which I shouldn't be, God is always with me)? Am I jealous of my friends (oops, there I go again, coveting)? Or am I wanting to get married so that my life and marriage can glorify God?
Well duh! Hadn't I just redevoted my life to God? Haven't I asked Him how I can glorify Him, through word or deed? Then, when it comes to the biggest decisions of my life (and yes, I believe that marriage is for life), shouldn't God be the first place I look? That whenever I get married, that relationship should glorify God even more than I could ever do on my own???
Duh duh duh.
So here goes another step on my journey. I will no longer be dating. Not in the sense that everybody means it. I will be serving the Lord. And when He sees fit, He will bring a man into my life who will see that I love God above all. If that man feels moved to, he will pursue me. And, if God wills it, that man will want to marry me. And I will want to marry Him. All for the glory of God. Not so we won't be lonely. Not because we feel it's time to settle down. Not so we can have kids. Just for HIM.
By using the Bible to live every aspect of my life, even with dating/courting/whatever-name-you-want-to-give-it, God will bless me more than if I think I could while attempting this alone. That's the great thing about having God in your life. You never have to do anything alone again. Even if you are 'single.'
Dear Lord - I cast all my cares on you. Especially the biggest one; how is it that I can best glorify YOU. I will attempt to have a servant's heart at all times. I submit to your Supremacy in my life. I pray for your help with my purity. I pray for my single brother's and sister's who are struggling. I pray that Your will be done. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the well spring of life.
Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
14For this reason I kneel before the Father,
15from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name.
16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,
17so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,
18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,
19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
20Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,
21to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:14-21 (NIV)
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Holding On To 'Today'
I am a night owl. Big time. It seems to 'run' in my family. Going to bed before 11 pm is AMAZING to me.
But lately I had the fault (typo, but I'm keeping it... hmmm), I mean thought. Am I hanging on to the day too long? Is the reason that I can be sooo tired, and still stay up until 1 or 2 or 3 am, because I can't shake off the day?
"This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad." (or better, This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24 NIV) ). The former version of the Psalm I remember singing in church as a child. More like it, I remember the older teenagers singing it, and always wishing I could be up there singing with them.
So yes, praise God for every day. Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him (there's another song, "praise Him praise Him all ye little children, God is love, God is love..."). God created the sun and the moon, day and night (Genesis 1:3). But what about holding on to the day for far too long? Almost to the point where you are attempting to put off the next day? Can this behavior be much like holding on to the past? And not trusting God with the future? (I know, this is getting nit-picky, but bear with me).
Why am I holding on to something that has already passed? Why am I holding on to the day, when it is already over? I should be rejoicing in the fact that the earlier I fall asleep, the 'sooner' a new day begins! Because a new day is a gift from God, and should be treated as such.
Why? Because I'm a fallen being in a fallen world. Because I am Israel, I keep yearning for Egypt; even when God blesses me with so much. I have fear for the future, and trouble trusting God that He will lead me to the land of milk and honey.
Well, this is all a process, right? One big thing my prayer life and new church has given me is a different perspective. And simple thinking/thoughts can lead to trouble, if your eyes aren't focused on Him.
Be intentional with your life, your thoughts. Not paying attention and losing your way can be the easiest thing in the world to do. In fact, it's just what the world wants you to do. Anything that can make you put yourself or others in front of God... that makes the world smile. And who would you rather make happy? The world, or God?
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
14 I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. [a] I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."
Jeremiah 29:11-14
Today's Devotional, Ecclesiastes 3:6
http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/3573/Ecclesiastes-3-6
But lately I had the fault (typo, but I'm keeping it... hmmm), I mean thought. Am I hanging on to the day too long? Is the reason that I can be sooo tired, and still stay up until 1 or 2 or 3 am, because I can't shake off the day?
"This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad." (or better, This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24 NIV) ). The former version of the Psalm I remember singing in church as a child. More like it, I remember the older teenagers singing it, and always wishing I could be up there singing with them.
So yes, praise God for every day. Praise Him, Praise Him, Praise Him (there's another song, "praise Him praise Him all ye little children, God is love, God is love..."). God created the sun and the moon, day and night (Genesis 1:3). But what about holding on to the day for far too long? Almost to the point where you are attempting to put off the next day? Can this behavior be much like holding on to the past? And not trusting God with the future? (I know, this is getting nit-picky, but bear with me).
Why am I holding on to something that has already passed? Why am I holding on to the day, when it is already over? I should be rejoicing in the fact that the earlier I fall asleep, the 'sooner' a new day begins! Because a new day is a gift from God, and should be treated as such.
Why? Because I'm a fallen being in a fallen world. Because I am Israel, I keep yearning for Egypt; even when God blesses me with so much. I have fear for the future, and trouble trusting God that He will lead me to the land of milk and honey.
Well, this is all a process, right? One big thing my prayer life and new church has given me is a different perspective. And simple thinking/thoughts can lead to trouble, if your eyes aren't focused on Him.
Be intentional with your life, your thoughts. Not paying attention and losing your way can be the easiest thing in the world to do. In fact, it's just what the world wants you to do. Anything that can make you put yourself or others in front of God... that makes the world smile. And who would you rather make happy? The world, or God?
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
14 I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. [a] I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."
Jeremiah 29:11-14
Today's Devotional, Ecclesiastes 3:6
http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/3573/Ecclesiastes-3-6
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
"A Woman's Question"
I’m copying this out of "I Kissed Dating Goodbye." The author (Joshua Harris) asks: Man Enough to Answer?
"A Woman’s Question"
by Lena Lathrop
Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman’s heart, and a woman’s life-
And a woman’s wonderful love
Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing
As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With the reckless dash of a boy.
You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now stand at the bars of my woman’s soul
Until I shall question thee.
You require your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart be true as God’s stars
And as pure as His heaven your soul.
You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing;
A seamstress you’re wanting for socks and shirts-
I look for a man and a king.
A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker, God,
Shall look upon as He did on the first
And say: "It is very good."
I am fair and young, but the rose may fade
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me then ’mid the falling leaves,
As you did ’mong the blossoms of May?
Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride.
I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I would stake my life
To be all you demand of me.
If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman’s heart and a woman’s life
Are not to be won that way.
Song of Solomon 8:4 (NIV)
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you:
Do not arouse or awaken love
until it so desires.
Go listen to Brooke Fraser's "Love is Waiting."
"Love Is Waiting"
In the autumn on the ground, between the traffic and the traffic and the ordinary sounds
I am thinking signs and seasons while a north wind blows through
I watch as lovers pass me by
Walking stories - whos and hows and whys
Musing lazily on love
Pondering you
I'll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it's time to walk that way we wana walk it well
[CHORUS]
I'll be waiting for you baby
I'll be holding back the darkest night
Love is waiting til we're ready, til it's right
Love is waiting
It's my caution not the cold
there's no other hand that i would rather hold
the climate changes, im singing for the strangers about you
dont keep time, slow the pace
Honey hold on if you canthe bets are getting surer now that you're my man
[CHORUS]
[BRIDGE]
I could right a million songs about the way you say my name
I could live a lifetime with you and then do it all again
and like I can't force the sun to rise or hasten summer's start,
neither should I rush my way into your heart
"A Woman’s Question"
by Lena Lathrop
Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman’s heart, and a woman’s life-
And a woman’s wonderful love
Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing
As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With the reckless dash of a boy.
You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now stand at the bars of my woman’s soul
Until I shall question thee.
You require your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart be true as God’s stars
And as pure as His heaven your soul.
You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing;
A seamstress you’re wanting for socks and shirts-
I look for a man and a king.
A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker, God,
Shall look upon as He did on the first
And say: "It is very good."
I am fair and young, but the rose may fade
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me then ’mid the falling leaves,
As you did ’mong the blossoms of May?
Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride.
I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I would stake my life
To be all you demand of me.
If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman’s heart and a woman’s life
Are not to be won that way.
Song of Solomon 8:4 (NIV)
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you:
Do not arouse or awaken love
until it so desires.
Go listen to Brooke Fraser's "Love is Waiting."
"Love Is Waiting"
In the autumn on the ground, between the traffic and the traffic and the ordinary sounds
I am thinking signs and seasons while a north wind blows through
I watch as lovers pass me by
Walking stories - whos and hows and whys
Musing lazily on love
Pondering you
I'll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it's time to walk that way we wana walk it well
[CHORUS]
I'll be waiting for you baby
I'll be holding back the darkest night
Love is waiting til we're ready, til it's right
Love is waiting
It's my caution not the cold
there's no other hand that i would rather hold
the climate changes, im singing for the strangers about you
dont keep time, slow the pace
Honey hold on if you canthe bets are getting surer now that you're my man
[CHORUS]
[BRIDGE]
I could right a million songs about the way you say my name
I could live a lifetime with you and then do it all again
and like I can't force the sun to rise or hasten summer's start,
neither should I rush my way into your heart
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Things I will tell my children...
* Daughter: If a man loves you, really loves and cares for you, then he will not ask you to disrespect yourself. So, if some guy swears he loves you, but is pressuring you to get physical, he is loving himself first. Don't fall for the 'but I'm in love' trap. It will snare you every time. The next thing you know, you are excusing behaviors that you know are wrong.
Now, go read 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye.' (that book just might be a sweet 16 present... or maybe earlier, who knows!?!).
Son: Don't mistake lust for love. Treat all women with respect. Don't let your desires take over to where taking someone for granted isn't a big deal. Treat every woman as your sister, until you are ready to be in a committed (i.e. close to marriage, one that will honor and glorify God) relationship. (I'm hoping that the future hubby will have more to add here).
Yeah, you go read 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye,' too. Borrow it from your sister. (or she can borrow it from you, whoever is born first, gets it first).
* If you feel as though you are doing something wrong, maybe even living your life wrong... PRAY ABOUT IT! Faithfully pray to God, and He will give you the answer. You just have to be prepared to hear what He is saying. You may even have to change your life. Go for it, it will be worth it.
* Read the Bible the WHOLE WAY THROUGH. Do it more than once. You will learn more from God each time you read it. Think of it as an instruction manual for life. Be aware that Israel is you. When you complain about gifts from God (manna), when you would prefer to go back to sin (Egyptian slavery)... keep reading, many more will jump out at you.
* Take TV and movies for what they are worth. As in entertainment only. It helps to think of how characters are doing things wrong with their lives, seeing how they put themselves first in everything... and the failures that can come of it. Realize that it's fiction, and in no way reflects real life, even when it seems like it does.
* Be aware of the lessons God is teaching you. When you put yourself above God, things will not turn out right. Yes, that means that YOU or ANYTHING ELSE can become a false god. Emotions, careers, family, friends, relationships, hobbies, lifestyles, idea of something...anything. An idol isn't just a graven image. It is anything that takes your focus away from God.
* It really is best to 'turn the other cheek.' This can be difficult, but just realize that the feelings that come from retribution are just as fleeting as any other emotion. Just know that loving someone, even if they aren't good to you, is GOOD for that person. And Jesus told us to love one another. It's always good to listen to Him! (John 13:34, and others)
One caveat: you don't have to stay in a relationship with someone who treats you unwell. I'm not saying 'put it with it' in that regard. Just be kind to those who aren't kind to you. It very may well be the only real love they ever experience (but hope that it's not!).
* When you go off on your own, be it for college or anything else; be sure to find a great church as soon as possible. You really do need it, and it's not being disloyal to your home church. Not getting involved with a local church makes being caught up in worldly things much easier. And that is not good, my child. It can only lead to darkness, not light. You do not want to be in the former.
* Learn how to witness early on. Don't be shy about it. Read everything that you can. Be discipled by other, more mature believers. (hopefully by then, I will be better at that, then I can help you).
* Never feel as though you are alone. You aren't. God is with you, always. He is the only One who can actually always be with you, know you fully (even better than yourself), and only wants what's good for you.
* Your parents love you very much, and only want what's best for you, too. Think of that before you rebel. If you have some unresolved issues lurking around in your mind, talk with your parents about them. We love you, nothing will change that.
I know you will want to experience many things on your own... but just know that you really CAN learn from other people’s mistakes. Trust me! ;)
Now, go read 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye.' (that book just might be a sweet 16 present... or maybe earlier, who knows!?!).
Son: Don't mistake lust for love. Treat all women with respect. Don't let your desires take over to where taking someone for granted isn't a big deal. Treat every woman as your sister, until you are ready to be in a committed (i.e. close to marriage, one that will honor and glorify God) relationship. (I'm hoping that the future hubby will have more to add here).
Yeah, you go read 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye,' too. Borrow it from your sister. (or she can borrow it from you, whoever is born first, gets it first).
* If you feel as though you are doing something wrong, maybe even living your life wrong... PRAY ABOUT IT! Faithfully pray to God, and He will give you the answer. You just have to be prepared to hear what He is saying. You may even have to change your life. Go for it, it will be worth it.
* Read the Bible the WHOLE WAY THROUGH. Do it more than once. You will learn more from God each time you read it. Think of it as an instruction manual for life. Be aware that Israel is you. When you complain about gifts from God (manna), when you would prefer to go back to sin (Egyptian slavery)... keep reading, many more will jump out at you.
* Take TV and movies for what they are worth. As in entertainment only. It helps to think of how characters are doing things wrong with their lives, seeing how they put themselves first in everything... and the failures that can come of it. Realize that it's fiction, and in no way reflects real life, even when it seems like it does.
* Be aware of the lessons God is teaching you. When you put yourself above God, things will not turn out right. Yes, that means that YOU or ANYTHING ELSE can become a false god. Emotions, careers, family, friends, relationships, hobbies, lifestyles, idea of something...anything. An idol isn't just a graven image. It is anything that takes your focus away from God.
* It really is best to 'turn the other cheek.' This can be difficult, but just realize that the feelings that come from retribution are just as fleeting as any other emotion. Just know that loving someone, even if they aren't good to you, is GOOD for that person. And Jesus told us to love one another. It's always good to listen to Him! (John 13:34, and others)
One caveat: you don't have to stay in a relationship with someone who treats you unwell. I'm not saying 'put it with it' in that regard. Just be kind to those who aren't kind to you. It very may well be the only real love they ever experience (but hope that it's not!).
* When you go off on your own, be it for college or anything else; be sure to find a great church as soon as possible. You really do need it, and it's not being disloyal to your home church. Not getting involved with a local church makes being caught up in worldly things much easier. And that is not good, my child. It can only lead to darkness, not light. You do not want to be in the former.
* Learn how to witness early on. Don't be shy about it. Read everything that you can. Be discipled by other, more mature believers. (hopefully by then, I will be better at that, then I can help you).
* Never feel as though you are alone. You aren't. God is with you, always. He is the only One who can actually always be with you, know you fully (even better than yourself), and only wants what's good for you.
* Your parents love you very much, and only want what's best for you, too. Think of that before you rebel. If you have some unresolved issues lurking around in your mind, talk with your parents about them. We love you, nothing will change that.
I know you will want to experience many things on your own... but just know that you really CAN learn from other people’s mistakes. Trust me! ;)
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Humble Pie and a Lightbulb Moment
*Warning: This starts out as a pity party, but doesn't end that way... trust me!*
Written at 12:45 am
How is it that I am repeatedly treated like a doormat? Taken for granted? It is literally a constant in my life. Almost every one in my life has treated me in this way at some point. 'Oh Mandi won't mind if I take things out on her.' 'Oh surely Mandi will be fine with me (attempting) to take that guy's attention away from her. Why does Mandi need attention from him, she should be paying attention to me!' 'Be a good friend? Nah, not to Mandi. She won't mind.' 'Hey, I know I've dated Mandi for x months, but it will totally be fine if I break up with her OVER THE PHONE!'
I could go on and on, psycho-analying my past, events that happened to me that made it easier just to keep my mouth shut- but really, that won't do any good. I have been praying really hard to have patience with such people mentioned above, but feel as though I've been too patient to begin with. How do I reconcile attempting to have a humble heart, when exhibiting humble behavior got me here in the first place?
My church small group has been reading Humility: True Greatness, by C.J. Mahoney. So far, verses such as the following have been discussed:
Isaiah 66:2 (KJV)
For all those things My hand has made, And all those things exist,” Says the LORD. “But on this one will I look:bOn him who is poor and of a contrite spirit, And who trembles at My word.
II Chronicles 16:9 (KJV)
For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is loyal to Him. In this you have done foolishly; therefore from now on you shall have wars.”
James 4:6 (KJV)
But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.”
Proverbs 8:13 (KJV)
The fear of the LORD is to hate evil; Pride and arrogance and the evil way And the perverse mouth I hate.
Proverbs 16:5 (KJV)
Everyone proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD; Though they join forces, none will go unpunished.
Proverbs 16:18 (KJV)
Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.
I Peter 5:5 (KJV)
Likewise you younger people, submit yourselves to your elders. Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.”
Mark 9:35 (KJV)
And He sat down, called the twelve, and said to them, “If anyone desires to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all.”
Mark 10:42-45 (KJV)
42 But Jesus called them to Himself and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. 43 Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you shall be your servant. 44 And whoever of you desires to be first shall be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
Could it really be that I've been 'humble' for all the wrong reasons? Give me a minute, I'm processing this. Walking on eggshells, careful not to disturb.... Have I been doing that for God, or for myself, and can I just chalk it up to 'that's how I am*'? I recall being told by my Grandma about treating others as I would have them treat me. Could it be that I was doing that for my own selfish gain? 'If I treat others well, then they will have to treat me the same.' Well, we all know that most people don't even care to get so close as to actually think what might be good for another. I shouldn't say most, but I'm in a rare (these days) pessimistic mood right now.
As with all things in life, if we do it for ourselves, not for God (as in putting ourselves above God), things will just not turn out right. Man, I feel like I've taken a beating lately. Oh well, I did ask God to help me 'dig out**' those unnoticable sins... I really shouldn't complain about answered prayers. It's all in your motivation, folks. M-O-T-I-V-A-T-I-O-N.
Wow, I feel better now! No more tears about this... this is another step taken.
What is your motivation for every aspect of your life? Really, try to sit and write it all down.
Is your motivation to glorify God? Glorify yourself? Or glorify someone else (even the idea of someone else)? Do you glorify an ideal? A philosophy? Hatha yoga? Who/What/Where/When/Why/How are you glorifying, through your actions, thoughts, deeds?
Dear Lord, I thank you for your kindness, grace and mercy. I thank you that when I ask, honestly want to know the truth about myself, you faithfully show me- warts and all. I am grateful for this, because it allows me to attempt to replace the bad stuff with good. I am grateful that when I ask, I do receive, even if it isn't all that easy to hear. And I want to be ever diligent to use the knowledge you have given me to Your HONOR and GLORY. Not mine or any other man. No one else's but Yours. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
*'I can't help who I am' doesn't cut it with God. Who you can be, through Him... now that's more like it.
**http://chasingfireworks.blogspot.com/2008/02/im-diggin-it.html
**http://chasingfireworks.blogspot.com/2008/01/now-you-have-wonderful-day-maam.html
Finished at 2:00 am.
GOOD READS FOR TODAY:
Regeneration, Faith, Love; In That Order
http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/2008/2647_Regeneration_Faith_Love_In_That_Order/
Proverbs 22:1
http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/928/Proverbs-22-1
Jehovah-Hayah; The Self-Sufficient Lord
http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/03/11/jehovah-hayah-the-self-sufficient-lord/#comments
How to Pray with God's Power
http://www.christianity.com/Home/Christian%20Living%20Features/1335889/
A Strong Man's Weakness
http://www.christianity.com/Home/Christian%20Living%20Features/11555320/
Written at 12:45 am
How is it that I am repeatedly treated like a doormat? Taken for granted? It is literally a constant in my life. Almost every one in my life has treated me in this way at some point. 'Oh Mandi won't mind if I take things out on her.' 'Oh surely Mandi will be fine with me (attempting) to take that guy's attention away from her. Why does Mandi need attention from him, she should be paying attention to me!' 'Be a good friend? Nah, not to Mandi. She won't mind.' 'Hey, I know I've dated Mandi for x months, but it will totally be fine if I break up with her OVER THE PHONE!'
I could go on and on, psycho-analying my past, events that happened to me that made it easier just to keep my mouth shut- but really, that won't do any good. I have been praying really hard to have patience with such people mentioned above, but feel as though I've been too patient to begin with. How do I reconcile attempting to have a humble heart, when exhibiting humble behavior got me here in the first place?
My church small group has been reading Humility: True Greatness, by C.J. Mahoney. So far, verses such as the following have been discussed:
Isaiah 66:2 (KJV)
For all those things My hand has made, And all those things exist,” Says the LORD. “But on this one will I look:bOn him who is poor and of a contrite spirit, And who trembles at My word.
II Chronicles 16:9 (KJV)
For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is loyal to Him. In this you have done foolishly; therefore from now on you shall have wars.”
James 4:6 (KJV)
But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.”
Proverbs 8:13 (KJV)
The fear of the LORD is to hate evil; Pride and arrogance and the evil way And the perverse mouth I hate.
Proverbs 16:5 (KJV)
Everyone proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD; Though they join forces, none will go unpunished.
Proverbs 16:18 (KJV)
Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.
I Peter 5:5 (KJV)
Likewise you younger people, submit yourselves to your elders. Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.”
Mark 9:35 (KJV)
And He sat down, called the twelve, and said to them, “If anyone desires to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all.”
Mark 10:42-45 (KJV)
42 But Jesus called them to Himself and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. 43 Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you shall be your servant. 44 And whoever of you desires to be first shall be slave of all. 45 For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
Could it really be that I've been 'humble' for all the wrong reasons? Give me a minute, I'm processing this. Walking on eggshells, careful not to disturb.... Have I been doing that for God, or for myself, and can I just chalk it up to 'that's how I am*'? I recall being told by my Grandma about treating others as I would have them treat me. Could it be that I was doing that for my own selfish gain? 'If I treat others well, then they will have to treat me the same.' Well, we all know that most people don't even care to get so close as to actually think what might be good for another. I shouldn't say most, but I'm in a rare (these days) pessimistic mood right now.
As with all things in life, if we do it for ourselves, not for God (as in putting ourselves above God), things will just not turn out right. Man, I feel like I've taken a beating lately. Oh well, I did ask God to help me 'dig out**' those unnoticable sins... I really shouldn't complain about answered prayers. It's all in your motivation, folks. M-O-T-I-V-A-T-I-O-N.
Wow, I feel better now! No more tears about this... this is another step taken.
What is your motivation for every aspect of your life? Really, try to sit and write it all down.
Is your motivation to glorify God? Glorify yourself? Or glorify someone else (even the idea of someone else)? Do you glorify an ideal? A philosophy? Hatha yoga? Who/What/Where/When/Why/How are you glorifying, through your actions, thoughts, deeds?
Dear Lord, I thank you for your kindness, grace and mercy. I thank you that when I ask, honestly want to know the truth about myself, you faithfully show me- warts and all. I am grateful for this, because it allows me to attempt to replace the bad stuff with good. I am grateful that when I ask, I do receive, even if it isn't all that easy to hear. And I want to be ever diligent to use the knowledge you have given me to Your HONOR and GLORY. Not mine or any other man. No one else's but Yours. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
*'I can't help who I am' doesn't cut it with God. Who you can be, through Him... now that's more like it.
**http://chasingfireworks.blogspot.com/2008/02/im-diggin-it.html
**http://chasingfireworks.blogspot.com/2008/01/now-you-have-wonderful-day-maam.html
Finished at 2:00 am.
GOOD READS FOR TODAY:
Regeneration, Faith, Love; In That Order
http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByDate/2008/2647_Regeneration_Faith_Love_In_That_Order/
Proverbs 22:1
http://theberean.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Home.showBerean/BereanID/928/Proverbs-22-1
Jehovah-Hayah; The Self-Sufficient Lord
http://thelife.com/blogs/experience/devotionalforwomen/2008/03/11/jehovah-hayah-the-self-sufficient-lord/#comments
How to Pray with God's Power
http://www.christianity.com/Home/Christian%20Living%20Features/1335889/
A Strong Man's Weakness
http://www.christianity.com/Home/Christian%20Living%20Features/11555320/
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
Follow up to "dare to be great" post
Okay, so in that blog, I alluded to something I felt that God was leading me to do. This was to enter the missionary field, particularly going overseas. I didn't know why, but it was on my mind constantly. So, my church had a missions meeting a few weeks ago, which was great. And I think I now know why I had missions work on my mind.
The meeting we had was an introduction to missions work, and in the specific areas my church is focusing on. It was an 'introduction to missions' for me. I have never sat through a meeting like that before. My church will, in the next 1-2 years, put together small groups to go overseas. The leader of the meeting said that you don't have to be absolutely sure about doing it, and that he will be having monthly meetings starting soon.
So, about a week after that meeting, I've figured out why missions work was in my mind. It prompted me to go to this meeting at my church. Which led to me learning about missions work, the different types (as far as short-medium-long term), and some obstacles that can stand in the way (my student loan debt being a BIG ONE - the organization my church goes through is reluctant to send people overseas who have debt, which is completely understandable-this is thinking in terms of the person and their ability to pay the debt).
In short, I feel as though going to these meetings will lead to something for me. Maybe going overseas, maybe just assisting with the mission workers that my church sends out, but ultimately, it will help me learn how to share the GOSPEL better. Which I think is why I thought of missions work in the first place. I'm in that EXCITED stage (which I hope to never lose), where I want everyone to feel the way I do, for everyone to know HIM... but I'm lacking in the area of sharing it. I feel as though my participation in these meetings, along with my attendance in my church's core seminar 'Apologetics and World Views' will lead me to where I want to be. Not exactly a physical location, but a spiritual one, where I can share the Good Word with confidence.
How's that for 'the Lord works in mysterious ways?' Pretty cool, huh? :)
Two other things I thought of were these: first, that I thought of doing mission work in the grandest way possible, because I felt guilty for going so long doing 'not so much,' that I wanted to do 'whoa, a lot.' I've found that when dealing with most things, baby steps are the best approach for me. Secondly, it would be great to go overseas, but that mission work can (and needs) to be done in my own back yard. So going to Africa, Asia or Europe may or may not be where God wants me to go. Only time will tell. So, I'll just keep on praying, and walking where He leads me.
Psalm 9 (King James Version)
10And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.
11Sing praises to the LORD, which dwelleth in Zion: declare among the people his doings.
The meeting we had was an introduction to missions work, and in the specific areas my church is focusing on. It was an 'introduction to missions' for me. I have never sat through a meeting like that before. My church will, in the next 1-2 years, put together small groups to go overseas. The leader of the meeting said that you don't have to be absolutely sure about doing it, and that he will be having monthly meetings starting soon.
So, about a week after that meeting, I've figured out why missions work was in my mind. It prompted me to go to this meeting at my church. Which led to me learning about missions work, the different types (as far as short-medium-long term), and some obstacles that can stand in the way (my student loan debt being a BIG ONE - the organization my church goes through is reluctant to send people overseas who have debt, which is completely understandable-this is thinking in terms of the person and their ability to pay the debt).
In short, I feel as though going to these meetings will lead to something for me. Maybe going overseas, maybe just assisting with the mission workers that my church sends out, but ultimately, it will help me learn how to share the GOSPEL better. Which I think is why I thought of missions work in the first place. I'm in that EXCITED stage (which I hope to never lose), where I want everyone to feel the way I do, for everyone to know HIM... but I'm lacking in the area of sharing it. I feel as though my participation in these meetings, along with my attendance in my church's core seminar 'Apologetics and World Views' will lead me to where I want to be. Not exactly a physical location, but a spiritual one, where I can share the Good Word with confidence.
How's that for 'the Lord works in mysterious ways?' Pretty cool, huh? :)
Two other things I thought of were these: first, that I thought of doing mission work in the grandest way possible, because I felt guilty for going so long doing 'not so much,' that I wanted to do 'whoa, a lot.' I've found that when dealing with most things, baby steps are the best approach for me. Secondly, it would be great to go overseas, but that mission work can (and needs) to be done in my own back yard. So going to Africa, Asia or Europe may or may not be where God wants me to go. Only time will tell. So, I'll just keep on praying, and walking where He leads me.
Psalm 9 (King James Version)
10And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.
11Sing praises to the LORD, which dwelleth in Zion: declare among the people his doings.
Monday, March 03, 2008
Are you a backslider?
I was a backslider. Definitely. I wouldn't say it was one big event, but it was a gradual slope, turned into a roller coaster ride (and I don't like roller coasters, so I can't say it was that much fun). Below is from a daily devotional that I read... well, daily. Written by C.H. Spurgeon.
"Renew a steadfast spirit within me." - Psalm 51:10
"A backslider, if there is a spark of life left in him, will groan after restoration. In this renewal the same exercise of grace is required as at our conversion. We needed repentance then; we certainly need it now. We wanted faith that we might come to Christ at first; only the same grace can bring us to Jesus now. We wanted a word from the Most High, a word from the lip of the loving One, to end our fears then; we shall soon discover, when under a sense of present sin, that we need it now. No one can be renewed without a manifestation of the Holy Spirit's energy that is as real and true as at the first renewal because the work is as great, and flesh and blood are just as present now as they ever were. Let your personal weakness, O Christian, be an argument to make you pray earnestly to your God for help. Remember, David didn't fold his arms or close his lips when he felt himself to be powerless; instead, he hastened to the mercy seat with "renew a steadfast spirit within me." Don't let the doctrine that you can do nothing unaided make you sleep; but let it be a goad in your side to drive you with great earnestness to Israel's strong Helper. O that you may have grace to plead with God, as though you pleaded for your very life - "Lord, renew a steadfast spirit within me." Those who sincerely pray to God to do this, will prove their honesty by using the means through which God works. Pray often; live upon the Word of God often; kill lusts which have driven your Lord from you; be careful to watch over future uprisings of sin. The Lord has His own appointed ways; sit by the wayside and you will be ready when He passes by. Continue in all those blessed ordinances which will foster and nourish your dying graces; and, knowing that all the power must proceed from Him, never stop saying, "Renew a steadfast spirit within me."
Morning and Evening, Charles H. Spurgeon, Hendrickson Publishers.
I will say that I read this AFTER I had decided to 'renew my spirit.' I did a lot of what Spurgeon listed towards the end of the devotional. Most importantly I prayed. I prayed, for change in myself. I prayed to God that I could finally see where I had gone wrong. Things that were both in and out of my control definitely took my focus away. I prayed to God to help me with this. To be close to Him again. To go back to how I used to be. I prayed for help to give everything up to Him. I prayed for Christian friends. I prayed for a place to fellowship.
And you know what? It's all coming true. It's unfolding slowly. Except this time it's hasn't been a roller coaster ride (although you never know...).
It has been beautiful.
Psalm 51 (King James Version)
1Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
2Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
3For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.
4Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.
5Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
6Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
7Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.
9Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.
10Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
11Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.
12Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit.
13Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee.
14Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: and my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness.
15O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise.
16For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give it: thou delightest not in burnt offering.
17The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.
18Do good in thy good pleasure unto Zion: build thou the walls of Jerusalem.
19Then shalt thou be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness, with burnt offering and whole burnt offering: then shall they offer bullocks upon thine altar.
"Renew a steadfast spirit within me." - Psalm 51:10
"A backslider, if there is a spark of life left in him, will groan after restoration. In this renewal the same exercise of grace is required as at our conversion. We needed repentance then; we certainly need it now. We wanted faith that we might come to Christ at first; only the same grace can bring us to Jesus now. We wanted a word from the Most High, a word from the lip of the loving One, to end our fears then; we shall soon discover, when under a sense of present sin, that we need it now. No one can be renewed without a manifestation of the Holy Spirit's energy that is as real and true as at the first renewal because the work is as great, and flesh and blood are just as present now as they ever were. Let your personal weakness, O Christian, be an argument to make you pray earnestly to your God for help. Remember, David didn't fold his arms or close his lips when he felt himself to be powerless; instead, he hastened to the mercy seat with "renew a steadfast spirit within me." Don't let the doctrine that you can do nothing unaided make you sleep; but let it be a goad in your side to drive you with great earnestness to Israel's strong Helper. O that you may have grace to plead with God, as though you pleaded for your very life - "Lord, renew a steadfast spirit within me." Those who sincerely pray to God to do this, will prove their honesty by using the means through which God works. Pray often; live upon the Word of God often; kill lusts which have driven your Lord from you; be careful to watch over future uprisings of sin. The Lord has His own appointed ways; sit by the wayside and you will be ready when He passes by. Continue in all those blessed ordinances which will foster and nourish your dying graces; and, knowing that all the power must proceed from Him, never stop saying, "Renew a steadfast spirit within me."
Morning and Evening, Charles H. Spurgeon, Hendrickson Publishers.
I will say that I read this AFTER I had decided to 'renew my spirit.' I did a lot of what Spurgeon listed towards the end of the devotional. Most importantly I prayed. I prayed, for change in myself. I prayed to God that I could finally see where I had gone wrong. Things that were both in and out of my control definitely took my focus away. I prayed to God to help me with this. To be close to Him again. To go back to how I used to be. I prayed for help to give everything up to Him. I prayed for Christian friends. I prayed for a place to fellowship.
And you know what? It's all coming true. It's unfolding slowly. Except this time it's hasn't been a roller coaster ride (although you never know...).
It has been beautiful.
Psalm 51 (King James Version)
1Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
2Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
3For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.
4Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.
5Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.
6Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.
7Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.
9Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.
10Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
11Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.
12Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit.
13Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee.
14Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: and my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness.
15O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise.
16For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give it: thou delightest not in burnt offering.
17The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.
18Do good in thy good pleasure unto Zion: build thou the walls of Jerusalem.
19Then shalt thou be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness, with burnt offering and whole burnt offering: then shall they offer bullocks upon thine altar.
Friday, February 22, 2008
"I am looking for a dare to be great situation"
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
My new favorite song... for now...
Ahhh, I can't find any good video of this song, so I will just have to copy off of another blogger... who likes to post lyrics to songs. Just wish y'all could hear it!
"Faithful"
There's distance in the air and I cannot make it leave
I wave my arms 'round about me and blow with all my might
I cannot sense you close, though I know you're always here
But the comfort of you near is what I long for
[CHORUS]
When I can't feel you, I have learned to reach out just the same
When I can't hear you, I know you still hear every word I pray
And I want you more than I want to live another day
And as I wait for you maybe I'm made more faithful
All the folly of the past, though I know it is undone
I still feel the guilty one, still trying to make it right
So I whisper soft your name, let it roll around my tounge,knowing you're the only one who knows me
You know me
[CHORUS]
[BRIDGE]
Show me how I should live this
Show me where I should walk
I count this world as loss to me
You are all I want
You are all I want
Check out an okay video here,(it just misses the first verse):
http://youtube.com/watch?v=vS_DMmJwlaA
"Faithful"
There's distance in the air and I cannot make it leave
I wave my arms 'round about me and blow with all my might
I cannot sense you close, though I know you're always here
But the comfort of you near is what I long for
[CHORUS]
When I can't feel you, I have learned to reach out just the same
When I can't hear you, I know you still hear every word I pray
And I want you more than I want to live another day
And as I wait for you maybe I'm made more faithful
All the folly of the past, though I know it is undone
I still feel the guilty one, still trying to make it right
So I whisper soft your name, let it roll around my tounge,knowing you're the only one who knows me
You know me
[CHORUS]
[BRIDGE]
Show me how I should live this
Show me where I should walk
I count this world as loss to me
You are all I want
You are all I want
Check out an okay video here,(it just misses the first verse):
http://youtube.com/watch?v=vS_DMmJwlaA
What if... / RAMBLIN' MAN-DI
Both written last night...
What if...
... God has a bigger plan for me than a husband and kids? Maybe not bigger, but... different. Although I can't imagine what that would be...
... I am single until I die (que movie scream, I think the shower scene from 'Psycho' would be appropriate).
A Baylor friend of mine once told me that she wrote a list of the characteristics she wanted in a man. Soon after making the list, she met her husband, and he met every single one of them. She talked me into doing the same.
Well, I came across that list the other day, and decided to do it again last night. As I wrote down different characteristics, I had a though. 'Wait a minute, this is how GOD is.'
TRUSTWORTHY, GIVING, LISTENS, UNDERSTANDS, WISE, LOVING, SELFLESS,
KNOWS THE REAL ME AND LOVES ME ANYWAY.
There is more to the list, like TRAVELS and COOKS, but none of that really matters (and believe me, I'm well aware that there is no man who can fulfill everything I think I want).
Here is my point (and I do have one). Everything I want, I already HAVE. So there. E-Harmony, quit sending me e-mails!
And of course I want things like companionship and romance... but WHAT IF I don't ever have those? (que movie scream, again). I know, total buzz-kill Mandi here, but... what if?
Well, I will just have to be fine with it. Because I'm certainly not settling for less than what I deserve. And if there is no man in God's plan for me? Well, I will just have to trust that God has a bigger plan for me... different than what I ever imagined.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
RAMBLIN' MAN-DI
I have a feeling that this will not be my last stop. Don't get me wrong, I love DC, but I just have this feeling.
Nothing I've done in my life has really been completely planned out. College... not so much. Jobs after college... nope. Grad school... and several tens of thousands of debt later... not really (cringe). Even moving to DC was fairly spur of the moment.
All of these decisions, when put into action, produced a lot of anxiety. Inevitably, though, I became happy with my decisions, and have had great (and some not so great) experiences. I have learned an extreme amount about myself and this world that I live in.
I feel as though I have been led down this path... maybe more of a nudge, if you will. So I'm just going to keep it up, not worry so much. To do otherwise, well, that just wouldn't be me.
Today's devotional (Feb. 20): http://christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/11568788/
What if...
... God has a bigger plan for me than a husband and kids? Maybe not bigger, but... different. Although I can't imagine what that would be...
... I am single until I die (que movie scream, I think the shower scene from 'Psycho' would be appropriate).
A Baylor friend of mine once told me that she wrote a list of the characteristics she wanted in a man. Soon after making the list, she met her husband, and he met every single one of them. She talked me into doing the same.
Well, I came across that list the other day, and decided to do it again last night. As I wrote down different characteristics, I had a though. 'Wait a minute, this is how GOD is.'
TRUSTWORTHY, GIVING, LISTENS, UNDERSTANDS, WISE, LOVING, SELFLESS,
KNOWS THE REAL ME AND LOVES ME ANYWAY.
There is more to the list, like TRAVELS and COOKS, but none of that really matters (and believe me, I'm well aware that there is no man who can fulfill everything I think I want).
Here is my point (and I do have one). Everything I want, I already HAVE. So there. E-Harmony, quit sending me e-mails!
And of course I want things like companionship and romance... but WHAT IF I don't ever have those? (que movie scream, again). I know, total buzz-kill Mandi here, but... what if?
Well, I will just have to be fine with it. Because I'm certainly not settling for less than what I deserve. And if there is no man in God's plan for me? Well, I will just have to trust that God has a bigger plan for me... different than what I ever imagined.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
RAMBLIN' MAN-DI
I have a feeling that this will not be my last stop. Don't get me wrong, I love DC, but I just have this feeling.
Nothing I've done in my life has really been completely planned out. College... not so much. Jobs after college... nope. Grad school... and several tens of thousands of debt later... not really (cringe). Even moving to DC was fairly spur of the moment.
All of these decisions, when put into action, produced a lot of anxiety. Inevitably, though, I became happy with my decisions, and have had great (and some not so great) experiences. I have learned an extreme amount about myself and this world that I live in.
I feel as though I have been led down this path... maybe more of a nudge, if you will. So I'm just going to keep it up, not worry so much. To do otherwise, well, that just wouldn't be me.
Today's devotional (Feb. 20): http://christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/11568788/
Friday, February 15, 2008
My Hope
My Hope lies not in any man
My Love comes from the Greatest Love
My Peace lies in the silence of His magesty...
My Heart awaits the day in which it will be made whole
My Will has been surrendered
My Pain no longer self-inflicted
My Life has been laid down before the One who gave His life for me
My Fear of the unknown has become...
My Joy in the adventure
My Prayer does not cease ... to amaze me in His answering
My Hope ... lies in the eternal Mercy and Grace of God.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Valentine's Day this year was a day of pure joy for me. It wasn't necessarily a conscious decision ... but it was wonderful. I could have cared less that I was yet again single. None of that mattered. I didn't feel lonely. Didn't feel sorry for myself ... It was almost as if I could feel God's love all around me. I could see it in the kindness of strangers and friends. I felt it in the usual way from my family. I witnessed it in a family who had just adopted a baby ... and allowed me to join in the celebration. It was a beautiful day.
Love is all around, obviously in varying degrees, but if you let yourself soak it all in ... it's something that I try to do every day. When you feel this way ... who cares about being single?!?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.
I John 4:16 (KJV)
My Love comes from the Greatest Love
My Peace lies in the silence of His magesty...
My Heart awaits the day in which it will be made whole
My Will has been surrendered
My Pain no longer self-inflicted
My Life has been laid down before the One who gave His life for me
My Fear of the unknown has become...
My Joy in the adventure
My Prayer does not cease ... to amaze me in His answering
My Hope ... lies in the eternal Mercy and Grace of God.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Valentine's Day this year was a day of pure joy for me. It wasn't necessarily a conscious decision ... but it was wonderful. I could have cared less that I was yet again single. None of that mattered. I didn't feel lonely. Didn't feel sorry for myself ... It was almost as if I could feel God's love all around me. I could see it in the kindness of strangers and friends. I felt it in the usual way from my family. I witnessed it in a family who had just adopted a baby ... and allowed me to join in the celebration. It was a beautiful day.
Love is all around, obviously in varying degrees, but if you let yourself soak it all in ... it's something that I try to do every day. When you feel this way ... who cares about being single?!?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.
I John 4:16 (KJV)
Monday, February 04, 2008
One of the reasons why I love my new church
We sing this song every single Sunday morning, in preparation of service... in preparation of worship...
How Deep the Father's Love
How deep the Father's love for us, how vast beyond all measure,
That he should give his only Son to make a wretch his treasure.
How great the pain of searing loss: the Father turns his face away,
As wounds which mar the chosen one bring many sons to glory.
Behold the man upon the cross, my sin upon his shoulders;
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers.
It was my sin that held him there until it was accomplished;
His dying breath has brought me life I know that it is finished.
I will not boast in anything, no gifts, no power, no wisdom;
But I will boast in Jesus Christ, his death and resurrection.
Why should I gain from his reward? I cannot give an answer,
But this I know with all my heart, his wounds have paid my ransom.
Author, Stuart Townend
Copywrite 1995 Kingsways' Thankyou Music
I cannot sing this without tearing up.
I'm glad to be part of a church that is not only Christ-centered and Bible-centered... but very much Gospel-centered.
UPDATE: Oops, we don't sing it every single Sunday. It just seemed like it for awhile....We do always sing a song about the Gospel, though... :)
How Deep the Father's Love
How deep the Father's love for us, how vast beyond all measure,
That he should give his only Son to make a wretch his treasure.
How great the pain of searing loss: the Father turns his face away,
As wounds which mar the chosen one bring many sons to glory.
Behold the man upon the cross, my sin upon his shoulders;
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers.
It was my sin that held him there until it was accomplished;
His dying breath has brought me life I know that it is finished.
I will not boast in anything, no gifts, no power, no wisdom;
But I will boast in Jesus Christ, his death and resurrection.
Why should I gain from his reward? I cannot give an answer,
But this I know with all my heart, his wounds have paid my ransom.
Author, Stuart Townend
Copywrite 1995 Kingsways' Thankyou Music
I cannot sing this without tearing up.
I'm glad to be part of a church that is not only Christ-centered and Bible-centered... but very much Gospel-centered.
UPDATE: Oops, we don't sing it every single Sunday. It just seemed like it for awhile....We do always sing a song about the Gospel, though... :)
Friday, February 01, 2008
February 1, 2008
12:14 am
One big push.... it away
There mere weight of it is crushing
My dreams
Something this big, this oppresive, how do I give it up.. to Him?
It's smothering, yet oddly comforting. Held tightly to myself for so long...
without it I would feel... laid bare... naked, undefended.
Opening up, feeling raw
A blast of wind so feared for the damage it could do.
Frightened more of the possibility than the reality
For what is reality, anyway?
What we see with our eyes, taste with our lips...
Or is it what we know in our hearts.
Isaiah 58:6 (KJV) Is not this fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
Dear friend, break every single yoke. Sometimes I fear it may take a lifetime... for me. There is a burden on me so great... I can only pray for God to help me BEGIN to know how to start giving it to Him. I feel as though a mountain has risen up before me... yet this time there is no denying it, no going the long way around, no avoiding the... adventure. I will go straight up, and stand breathless at its peak. Victorious. And smiling.
Dig up those roots, friends.
Start digging.
Dear Lord, This one may take awhile. I pray for patience, for perserverence, I pray for... ultimate peace. I will not give up, for I know you will not, will never give up on me. I owe myself that same courtesy. Thank you for every blessing you have bestowed upon me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
This morning's devotional: 'They Will See God.'
http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/11566469/
12:14 am
One big push.... it away
There mere weight of it is crushing
My dreams
Something this big, this oppresive, how do I give it up.. to Him?
It's smothering, yet oddly comforting. Held tightly to myself for so long...
without it I would feel... laid bare... naked, undefended.
Opening up, feeling raw
A blast of wind so feared for the damage it could do.
Frightened more of the possibility than the reality
For what is reality, anyway?
What we see with our eyes, taste with our lips...
Or is it what we know in our hearts.
Isaiah 58:6 (KJV) Is not this fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
Dear friend, break every single yoke. Sometimes I fear it may take a lifetime... for me. There is a burden on me so great... I can only pray for God to help me BEGIN to know how to start giving it to Him. I feel as though a mountain has risen up before me... yet this time there is no denying it, no going the long way around, no avoiding the... adventure. I will go straight up, and stand breathless at its peak. Victorious. And smiling.
Dig up those roots, friends.
Start digging.
Dear Lord, This one may take awhile. I pray for patience, for perserverence, I pray for... ultimate peace. I will not give up, for I know you will not, will never give up on me. I owe myself that same courtesy. Thank you for every blessing you have bestowed upon me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
This morning's devotional: 'They Will See God.'
http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/11566469/
I'm diggin' it
February 1, 2008
12:14 am
One big push.... it away
The mere weight of it is crushing
My dreams
Something this big, this oppresive, how do I give it up.. to Him?
It's smothering, yet oddly comforting. Held tightly to myself for so long...
without it I would feel... laid bare... naked, undefended.
Opening up, feeling raw
A blast of wind so feared for the damage it could do.
Frightened more of the possibility than the reality
For what is reality, anyway?
What we see with our eyes, taste with our lips...
Or is it what we know in our hearts.
Isaiah 58:6 (KJV) Is not this fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
Dear friend, break every single yoke. Sometimes I fear it may take a lifetime... for me. There is a burden on me so great... I can only pray for God to help me BEGIN to know how to start giving it to Him. I feel as though a mountain has risen up before me... yet this time there is no denying it, no going the long way around, no avoiding the... adventure. I will go straight up, and stand breathless at its peak. Victorious. And smiling.
Dig up those roots, friends.
Start digging.
Dear Lord, This one may take awhile. I pray for patience, for perserverence, I pray for... ultimate peace. I will not give up, for I know you will not, will never give up on me. I owe myself that same courtesy. Thank you for every blessing you have bestowed upon me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
This morning's devotional: 'They Will See God.'
http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/
12:14 am
One big push.... it away
The mere weight of it is crushing
My dreams
Something this big, this oppresive, how do I give it up.. to Him?
It's smothering, yet oddly comforting. Held tightly to myself for so long...
without it I would feel... laid bare... naked, undefended.
Opening up, feeling raw
A blast of wind so feared for the damage it could do.
Frightened more of the possibility than the reality
For what is reality, anyway?
What we see with our eyes, taste with our lips...
Or is it what we know in our hearts.
Isaiah 58:6 (KJV) Is not this fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
Dear friend, break every single yoke. Sometimes I fear it may take a lifetime... for me. There is a burden on me so great... I can only pray for God to help me BEGIN to know how to start giving it to Him. I feel as though a mountain has risen up before me... yet this time there is no denying it, no going the long way around, no avoiding the... adventure. I will go straight up, and stand breathless at its peak. Victorious. And smiling.
Dig up those roots, friends.
Start digging.
Dear Lord, This one may take awhile. I pray for patience, for perserverence, I pray for... ultimate peace. I will not give up, for I know you will not, will never give up on me. I owe myself that same courtesy. Thank you for every blessing you have bestowed upon me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
This morning's devotional: 'They Will See God.'
http://www.christianity.com/devotionals/encouragement/
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